A girl's story

There bukky sat staring at her phone. As if willing it to ring with the intensity of her gaze. She gazed back at her watch, and was startled to find that 5mins had barely passed since the last time she checked. Standing up she went to the living room to check the wall clock, perhaps her watch was running slow. But that wasn't so..her watch was right on time. This was becoming a trend. Having to wait for bayo's call. Many times falling asleep in the process. I hope he's alright she thought. And said a silent prayer for him. Or could he have forgotten to take his phone to work like he did on monday?, she tought to herself. But even if, she argued, its 10.45pm, surely he would be back home by now. Why was his phone still switched off? Or could he be.......... No. She quickly shook the thought off before it took root. Never. Not her bayo. He loved her. He could never cheat. She was sure of that.

How many ladies have gone through this, later to find out the signs had been there all along...
In his eyes, as they scanned the room.
In his answers, as he looked everywhere but you.
In the coughs and the yawns, and the many pauses in-between.
When what was said that day doesn't square with what's said today.
How could you forget the silence, and the phone that's always turned off?
And when it isn't? "I'm sorry baby, the ring tone was low". Or more appropriately the macho answer, "its nothing, you're just overreacting"
The little things you so easily made excuses for.."He's been busy"..."he forgot"..."I understand, he's going through alot", you say. More to convince yourself than others.
And so the calls come every now and then.
The "darlings" and "sweethearts" gradually fade.
As the suspicions you try so hard to ignore gains momentum, you find you can't take advice you so often give.
What is happening? You ask in between tears. It was supposed to be happily ever after.
But he's not Alaadin and you're not Jasmine.
Slowly the pieces fall in place.
Yes...the signs were there all along, but you were too much in love to see them.
And so he slipped...
Further and further he slipped...
Till your heart couldn't find his where it once lived.

Note to ladies..
Not every guy cheats. If you have a guy that loves you, and proves it too, don't analyze him, don't smother him, don't be a nag and please remain faithful. And most importantly love and appreciate him.
If he still leaves after that, he isn't yours.
If he is yours, he'll surely come back to you.
If he doesn't remember good things fall apart for better things to fall together.
So keep your head up.

Love tomiwa

50 years and 1 week

Today last week Nigeria marked its 50th independence anniversary.
Today last week the (social)media was filled with the independence day cheer.
Today last week our phones were flooded with positive messages about Nigeria.
Today last week the rumoured "N72million cake" was baked.
Today last week the 15 children kidnapped in Abia state were released.
Today last week I heard about the scramble for the 1st lady's brazil imported rice.
Today last week 8 people were killed in the independence day bomb blast.

A week went by...
And today I ask; where did the cheer and merriment go?
Today there is no one "reppin" or "loving" Nigeria on my twitter page.
Today I ask; who did eat outta the rumoured cake?
Today I ask whatever happened to our very own Nigerian rice?
Today I hear that just yesterday Borno ANPP chairman was murdered.
Today I hear there has been another kidnap.
Today I ask who really was behind the independence day bomblasts?

Today last week I was going to update an independence day blogpost...but it sounded too cliche even to me.
And today? Forgive me if this still sounds cliche..
Its only because the country appears to be a walking talking candle lit cliche.
You wanna know what isn't a cliche even though it might have been over-stressed?
Its the fact that things must change for the better.
But will sitting around making pronouncements change a thing?
Definitely not!
Now change is an effect of action.
Its our call to uphold the vision that reformers fought for 50 years and 1 week ago.
A vision of a truely independent state.
What we need is a leader who shares this vision.
Hopefully come 2011 elections he/she will have been identified and is goin to get my vote. What about yours?

Music and Me

For some music is an art...
To be studied...to be appreciated.
A skill to be acquired.

For others its an expression...
In times of joy and sadness.
A song for every tear...for every laughter.

For some its a stimulant...
The beat, the tempo.
The rise and the fall.

And yet for some others its a solace...
A hiding place.
Far from the maddening world.

And for me?
Music is all these and more.
Lemme put it this way...
M is for the Memories each song brings.
U is for words Unspoken.
S is for when I need to fill the Silence.
I its my Inspiration.
C my Confidant...my friend.

To me music is a gift.
I thank God for music.

Are you bugged?

...Ever noticed how easy it is to take credit for accomplishments, great or small. And when its the reverse? There's a long line of "guilt takers"(who ofcourse are never on ground to defend themselves),both animate and inanimate at our disposal for chucking the blame.
Its a bug! Ubiquitous. Plaguing the young and old, literate and illiterate. Its no respecter of person.
...You think you are not infected?
Not so fast!
...Remember that day you were late for class and missed a test? What was your excuse again? "There was traffic on the road" or wait, was it that "your alarm didn't go off"? How easy it was to omit that you stayed up all night on "midnight call" with your "bobo", and as such woke up at 9:45, for a 10am class! (I've been guilty of this one, don't blame me, blame MTN:|).
...And when you make a bad business decision? Ofcourse "your workers are incompetent". And yes, Mr. Shogologobangoshe, your competitor; "how dare he think of the innovation before you did"?
...You're still a spinster at 35 because you're waiting for Mr."TDHR"(tall, dark, handsome and rich..yes the 'R' factor has been added), forgetting dat Mr."SAP"(short,albino and poor)sef is in short supply. You go for deliverance, casting and binding the witch in your village who has tied up your "Mr. Perfect"; or perharps more appropriately, your friend who has a TDHR fiancee that you are secretly coveting.(Ladies hold on to your men..girls are not smiling).
...As a self acclaimed caterer, you know you have zero culinary skills, yet you go on and open a "buka"...when customers rush 'Iya Basira's food' now..why? "She wash put"!
...How quick we are to blame "soponna" //shokpona// (god of small pox) for one misfortune or the other. Chai!, the deities have suffered.
...The saddest remains when we blame God. And what is His crime? Offering His Son as a sacrificial lamb for our sins?
When we blame others for our actions, we let them dictate the outcome of our lives, and you know how the saying goes..."Whoever plays the piper dictates the tune"...and dance to it you must!
So I'm thinking...why not make my own music? That way I get to dance when and how I want...doing "the jerk" one minute and "alanta" the next.
Fighting this bug means taking the reigns of my actions...
Yes I said it!...that's me taking the first step.