NURSERY RYHMES (Uncensored Version)

Mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow;
But what the nursery rhyme left out is that the lamb was slow.
It followed her to school one day which was against the rules;
The poor lil Mary missed the bus and so was late for school.
And so the teacher turned it out but still it lingered near;
It plugged in its Beats by Dre till Mary did appear.
"Why does the lamb love Mary so?” the eager children cry!;
"Why, that's Jamb question, number one", the teacher did reply.

(While the children were busy trying to answer that last question, it did attract 50marks you know, Jack and Jill snuck out the class, the teacher close at their heel...*inserts nollywood sound track here*)

So Jack and Jill went up the hill to "fetch a pail of water" (*wink wink*)
When Jack "went down", he hurt his neck,
That's where the teacher's cane landed.

"Baa baa black sheep, are you not in school??!" (The teacher shouted)
"Yee pa, yee pa; I'm in soup!" (Jill cried)
"One for the master", the dirty teacher leered.
"And one for the little boy (Jack), to shut his mouth!"

(You see Jill was so good, the teacher just had to ask.)

Teacher: Pussycat Pussycat where have you been?

Jill: I've been up to London, to be with Chief.

Teacher: Pussy cat pussy cat, what did you dare?

Jill: I frightened the little man when he saw the hair.

(Unknown to Jack, and the Teacher, coupling with Jill had given them herpes, but since they had no idea, they were busy chasing the little boy who had gotten them all on tape.)

Three blind mice, see how they run;
They run after the farmer's son,
Who put up the video on you-tube the next day,
Have you ever seen such a thing in your life? (Well apart from on Linda Ikeji's blog)
As these three blind mice.

THE END


NB: This may or may not have been written by me and in either case was purely for jokes.


Peace!