So here I am, fine wednesday afternoon, still in my ex's over sized tee shirt turned nightie and ankara shorts chatting away to an old friend, and naturally as it's a custom when girls talk (not gossip mind you...like I'd ever stoop so low *straight face*), the topic of the opposite sex creeps up. Today we are talking exes. You see Karen* thinks an ex is still sweet on me and I'm determined to prove otherwise.
Karen: Exes can't be just friends.
Me: Say's who?
Karen: Its just normal. It's just like the Okafor's law says. Once u've been physically or romantically involved with someone, even when you're over, residual feelings remain, such that "having something" is not ruled out.
But wait o, who is this blasted Okafor and who died and made his law a given?
Why can't exes be JUST friends???
The other day I was with a male friend and his argument was that after a breakup, one partner is bound to still be physically or emotionally attached to the other. In other words, if I'm still friends with my ex, he is either emotionally attached to me or he (still) wants to jump my bones or vice versa.
I'd concede to his argument in cases where parting ways was solely one person's idea or circumstances beyond their control caused a breakup. But what about cases where the breakup was a mutual decision. "What stops my ex and I from being just friends like any normal opposite sex friendship?", I asked. Only to be informed that guys and girls "can't be friends". To which I say...bollocks!!!
I'm friends with loads of guys (exes inclusive) and they are friends with other girls too. Do they want to get with US all? C'mon!!!
Of course sometimes, we might still have feelings for an ex or they with us, but what of those that we are well over? Surely nothing stops us from being platonic friends, right? RIGHT?
Yes I care about my exes' welfare, like I do with all my friends. No I don't have feelings for them neither do I plan on getting physical with them nor do they necessarily want to do the same with me...off with Okafor's head!
